Records of my summer days

"You'll get through this," 2019 came gracefully, welcomed me that way a year ago. "Will I? Everything has shattered into pieces, 2018 promised me the same thing last year," "You will, I promise you. It won't be that bad. What are you scared of?" as it held me dearly, warmly. 30 - 12 - 19 The answers lie within your thoughts with yourself. Have you find it yet, the things that make you scared to foresee the future?

Hari ini hujan lagi dan aku mengeluh lagi. Untuk ke sekian kalinya bajuku harus menerima ribuan rintik air hujan hingga airnya meresap hampir ke seluruh sisinya. Angin malam menusuk kulitku lebih tajam dari malam-malam saat tak setetespun air menyentuh kulitku. Mengapa setiap aku sedang tidak berada di dalam ruang tertutup hujan turun tanpa henti, bahkan bertambah deras tiap detiknya? Berkecamuk ribuan pikiran merasa tak adil akan keadaan yang aku terima. Bajuku basah bukan main. Tasku yang bahannya tidak kedap air, tentu saja menyalurkan kelembabannya ke seluruh barang-barang di dalamnya. Keyakinanku mencapai puncaknya akan kemungkinan bukuku mengeriting sebab terbasuh air. Ternyata, sesederhana harus berhadapan dengan hujan lagi, amarahku sangat kuat untuk mendorong gerutuanku memenuhi seisi pikiran sepanjang perjalanan pulang. Sama seperti kondisi kacamataku kala hujan, buram pikiranku dihalangi amarah. Semakin kencang motor melaju, dingin semakin mencakar-cakar indera per

I have always chosen autumn over summer Autumn has its own charm regardless how sometimes the cold and sudden pouring rain ruin my perfect day I have always chosen the season when most trees lost their leaves I like it that much, or maybe too much Without realizing that God grants my wish to be together with it by letting me feel the sorrow vibe it has Never knowing, even a little, that I would stuck all over again with autumn

Dear, I was told that it is not easy to start on something and leave your comfort zone Well, No, It is harder to hold on and keep on to something you already have Leave might not be on your list Yet you never know what's on the other's list Thank you for staying for a while I might have fallen, flown, and now it is time to gone May I see you when the time is right and the whole universe let me do so May they also won't let me miss the presence of you Meeting you was the best gift, and knowing you deeper was the greatest plot twist. Jakarta 2019, when the sky woke me up after 180 days of sleep

People are not machine Nor a robot They are not coded with complex scripts Not programmed with countable numbers Nor even can be predicted with combination and permutation People are not machine All their thoughts cannot be simply written on word with existing letters on the keyboard Their feelings cannot be easily heard just by connecting a cable So does the mind, cannot be arranged as easy as you arrange your desktop's display People are not machine Even you are not Even I am not People are not machine And thus I can't predict your act using any kind of statistics formula People are full of uncertainty With all numbers of possibilities in this universe One might choose none of them Or maybe all of them People are not machine And that is the charm Surprises, unpredicted bugs People are not machine People are not machine  And PEoPle aRe nOt And I,                            Again,                                                

C/ With the colour of blue, you came Ask me to play join a game Without a sign, you invite me in Deeper and deeper To the game, I have never been in Nothing around, just you and your game And I only watch you play And stay D/ And stay  Until the blue no longer give a clue Until the grey start to play away Until I walk away to the grey And leave every hey you say

There,     you got me     with your smile     with the scent of your jacket     with your words     with your thoughts     with the way you call my name There,     you got me Here,     I lost you     by the moment you say no     by the moment our talk no longer with a laugh     by the stories you no longer want to tell Here,     I lost you